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Life / Relationship / People

When working with people, assume good intentions.

When listening to people, interpret their words in a generous way.

You will occasionally get burned and mistreated by always assuming the best in others, but it is a far better way to live than the opposite

Never tell people that they are moron

There are some very smart people in the world who like to solve really hard problems.

Like should be treated alike

If you trust me then you shouldn't ask for my account statement and if you don't trust me then you should trust my given account statement - Pandit Jawaharlal Nehru to his father

time spent with family over age

Ernest Hemingway​

  • Before you talk, listen.
  • Before you react, think.
  • Before you spend, earn.
  • Before you criticise, wait.
  • Before you pray, forgive.
  • Before you quit, try.

Building a Life - Howard H. Stevenson

  • What makes you happy
  • What you want to achieve

Friendship​

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Tips​

  • Always make the first move
  • In marriages, there are divergent expectations. The woman expects the man to change. The man expects the woman to never change.
  • Early concepts of intimacy: Young humans use saliva sharing to infer close relationships - https://www.science.org/doi/10.1126/science.abh1054

Party / Host / Hosting / Ceremony / Anchor / Commentator​

MC is short for Master of Ceremonies and may often be written as emcee. An MC can be an important part of a birthday party, acting as a host to allow the birthday boy or girl to enjoy the party along with guests. Although the party atmosphere will provide a good time, the MC ideally remains focused on the multifaceted responsibilities the job demands.

  • Announcements
  • Music selection
  • Setting the tone
  • Setting the place

https://pdfslide.net/documents/emcee-academic-debate-script.html

https://www.ehow.com/info_8146690_mcs-duties-birthday-party.html

https://www.ehow.com/info_8201232_duties-emcee.html

  1. Arrive to the party venue well before the guests so you can become familiar with the sound system and test the microphone. Showing up early will also allow you to see how the party site is set up, so you know where to make eye contact to keep the audience engaged.

  2. Look at the program for your manager's farewell party. As the MC, you'll need to know how to introduce each speaker that will present an award or kind word to the guest of honor. If you have a small speech prepared, becoming familiar with the program will give you an idea of when you should present it. If necessary, jot down a few notes on the program that will help you with guest introductions, such as "worked with guest of honor the longest" or "closest professional friend."

  3. Take your place on the stage or podium before guests arrive so you can welcome all the party goers.

  4. State the reason for the gathering, and lead the guests in showing your manager a round of applause as she's ushered into the room or seated at the main table.

  5. Introduce each individual before he gets up to share a short speech or poem at the celebration, using your notes as guidelines. Encourage the crowd to give every presenter a round of applause as he walks to the front of the room.

  6. Conclude the speaking portion of the farewell party by sharing a fond memory you have of your manager, and calling her up to the front so you can present her with a gift from you and the rest of your colleagues, like a plaque or large bouquet of flowers.

  7. Thank everyone for coming to the farewell celebration and prompt everyone to continue socializing or dining or cordially dismiss them from the party venue, depending on how the program is scheduled.

Techniques for preparing for stressed events beforehand​

  • Prospective Hindsight
  • Pre-mortem

Boundaries​

You have a boundary issue if...

  • you feel like people take advantage of you or use your emotions for their own gain.
  • you feel like you're constantly having to "save" people close to you and fix their problems all the time.
  • you find yourself sucked into pointless fighting or debating regularly.
  • you find yourself more invested in a person than you should.
  • you tell people how much you hate drama but seem to always be stuck in the middle of it.
  • you spend a lot of time defending yourself for things you believe aren't your fault

https://deepstash.com/article/3412/the-guide-to-strong-boundaries

Types of people​

  1. Maker
  2. Scientist
  3. Maven (learning/knowledge acquisition)
  4. Essentialist (organizer)
  5. Performer
  6. Warrior
  7. Teachers
  8. Advocate
  9. Advisor
  10. Nurturer

Talking​

  • F - Family
  • O - Occupation
  • R - Recreational
  • D - Dreams

First question must be directed towards the Heart.

Ex - What's the best moment you remember with your father

Start with I'm curious

Daily talk about (rose, thorn, bud excercise)

  • rose - best part of your day
  • thorn - worst part of your day
  • bud - something in your day that gave you hope

Meaning of life​

  • Belonging
  • Purpose
  • Transcendence
  • Story Telling - How you tell story about yourself, Change your story to change your life

HEAR (Halt, Empathy, Anticipate, Review)​

Pleasure​

Extrinsic Pleasure (do work that leads to pleasure)

Intrinsic Pleasure (happiness while doing that work)

Abstain from short term pleasure

  • Meditation
  • Deep Work
  • Not To Do List

Transcendental Meditation​

Transcendental Meditation(TM) refers to a specific form of silent, mantrameditation and to the organizations that constitute the Transcendental Meditation movement.Maharishi Mahesh Yogi created and introduced the TM technique and TM movement in India in the mid-1950s.

The TM technique involves the use of a silently-used sound called a mantra, and is practiced for 15--20 minutes twice per day. It is taught by certified teachers through a standard course of instruction, which costs a fee that varies by country. According to the Transcendental Meditation movement, it is a non-religious method for relaxation, stress reduction, and self-development. The technique has been seen as both religiousand non-religious;sociologists, scholars, and a New Jersey judge and court are among those who have expressed views on it being religious or non-religious.The United States Court of Appeals upheld the federal ruling that TM was essentially "religious in nature" and therefore could not be taught in public schools.

High-quality studies that demonstrate positive health outcomes that can be attributed to the specific practice of TM as compared to other forms of stress reduction do not exist.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Transcendental_Meditation

Healthy social interactions​

  1. Tolerating frustration
  2. Flexibility
  3. Problem solving abilities
  4. Empathy
  5. Engaged observation

Implicit Association Test (IAT)​

The implicit-association test(IAT) is a measure within social psychology designed to detect the strength of a person's subconscious association between mental representations of objects (concepts) in memory. It is commonly applied to assess implicit stereotypes held by test subjects, such as unconsciously associating stereotypically black names with words consistent with black stereotypes. The test's format is highly versatile, and has been used to investigate biases in racial groups, gender, sexuality, age, and religion, as well as assessing self-esteem.

The IAT was introduced in the scientific literature in 1998 by Anthony Greenwald, Debbie McGhee, and Jordan Schwartz.The IAT is now widely used in social psychology research and, to some extent, in clinical, cognitive, and developmental psychology research. The IAT is the subject of much controversy regarding validity, reliability, and whether test results are an accurate representation of implicit bias.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Implicit-association_test

Ethnography - Study of people and culture​

in-depth observation of how people behave and interact with their surroundings

Worst idea of psychology - Mind is a blank slated birth​

Developmental psychology has shown that kids come into the world, already knowing so much about the physical and social world and programmed in such a way as to make it easy to learn certain things and hard to learn others

Inateness​

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  1. Harm/care
  2. Fairness/reciprocity
  3. Ingroup/loyalty
  4. Authority/respect
  5. Purity/sanctity

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8SOQduoLgRw

  • Basketball - strong link
  • Football - weak link
  • Programming - strong link
  • Investment group - strong link
  • Donation to Schools should be weak link

YouTube

7 reasons smart, hardworking people don't become successful​

  1. Meet same people, ideas are recycled. Solution is to meet new people
  2. Aversion to change. Solution - be open and curious
  3. Rely on credentials. Solution - Strategic thinking
  4. Not willing to take risks
  5. You can't commit to decisions
  6. Constantly go after exiting things and leave things mid way, Shiny object syndrome
  7. You don't believe in yourself

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Ubuntu - I am because you are​

Ubuntu is an ancient African word meaning 'humanity to others'. It is often described as reminding us that 'I am what I am because of who we all are'.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ubuntu_philosophy

Michael Burry: 5 Life Lessons That Made Him Rich (UCLA Speech)

  • Be a hyper realist, don't try to assume the world as you want, but take it as it is
  • Question everything
  • Be skeptical for most authoritative sources too
  • Don't stop learning
  • Use information abundance as an advantage
    • We are privileged to have so much information at our finger tips
  • Do no harm

Parasocial Relationship​

Parasocial interaction(PSI) refers to a kind of psychological relationship experienced by an audience in their mediated encounters with performers in the mass media, particularly on television and on online platforms.Viewers or listeners come to consider media personalities as friends, despite having no or limited interactions with them. PSI is described as an illusionaryexperience, such that media audiences interact with personas(e.g., talk show hosts, celebrities, fictional characters, social media influencers) as if they are engaged in a reciprocal relationship with them. The term was coined by Donald Horton and Richard Wohl in 1956.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Parasocial_interaction

Types of People in Life​

  1. Leaf People - These people come into your life for a short time. You can't rely on them because they are not strong. They only take what they need, then they leave.
  2. Branch People - They seem strong, but they break away when things get tough. They stay for a while, but when life gets harder, they disappear.
  3. Root People - These are the most important people. They don't help just to be noticed. They stay with you through hard times. They support you, care for you, and accept you as you are. Root people stay, no matter the season.

Classes​

Rich Class , Middle Class And Lower Class | A Different Emotion Defining Them - YouTube

  • Upper class - Ambitions
  • Middle class - Aspirations
  • Lower class - Enthusiasm

Lottery of Birth / Lottery of Life / Ovarian Lottery​

“Birth is life’s first lottery ticket.” — Jeffrey Archer

The "birth lottery" (or "lottery of birth") refers to the idea that the circumstances of one's birth—including factors like wealth, location, social class, race, gender, health, and family background—are random and beyond one's control, yet significantly influence a person's entire life and opportunities. This philosophical concept highlights inherited inequalities and how "accidents of birth" shape individual destinies, sparking discussions on fairness, privilege, and the need to address inherent disadvantages.

  • “We do not choose to exist.”
  • “As newborns, we’re not responsible for our own natures, we’re endowed with genes that we didn’t ask for.”
  • “We’re faced with a world that we played no part in creating.”
  • “We do not choose what environment we grow up in.”
  • “We do not choose our identity, we inherit it.”

Key Aspects of the Birth Lottery​

  • Randomness: Individuals do not choose their birth circumstances.
  • Inherited Inequalities: The random nature of birth creates deeply unequal starting points for different people.
  • Impact on Life: These initial circumstances profoundly shape a person's access to resources, opportunities, education, healthcare, and overall life experiences.
  • Philosophical Underpinnings: The concept is a philosophical argument about fairness and responsibility, suggesting that people should not be held accountable for circumstances they did not choose.

Examples of Factors Influenced by the Birth Lottery​

  • Socioeconomic Status: Being born into a wealthy family versus a poor one.
  • Geography: The country, region, or even neighborhood one is born in.
  • Social Groupings: Caste, religion, race, and language.
  • Health: Being born with or without a disability.
  • Family and Gender: Being born into a specific family, at a certain birth order, or with a particular gender identity.
  • Inherited Social Inequalities: The birth lottery is a fundamental cause of persistent social inequalities.
  • Privilege: Understanding the birth lottery helps explain how certain groups benefit from unearned advantages.
  • Justice and Fairness: The concept raises ethical questions about societal structures and whether they provide equal opportunities or perpetuate inherited disadvantages.

Others​