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Parenting Fundamentals

"The children are always ours, every single one of them, all over the globe; and I am beginning to suspect that whoever is incapable of recognizing this may be incapable of morality." -- James Baldwin

When you come from nothing, you want to give your kids everything. Then you realize giving them everything teaches them nothing. -- Taylor Swift

Core Principles​

  • Use adjectives - "Teddy's fur is soft," "The radio is quiet," "The tree outside is big"
  • Open cup drinking
  • Praise for effort and not outcome
  • Acknowledge their emotions - tell them that their emotions are valid
  • There are no bad children, only bad influences -- Sadhguru
  • Record their voice and let them hear it
  • If you have children, first of all, you have to establish integrity. Your words and your actions should match. -- Sadhguru
  • Don't be a Helicopter Parent
  • Eat candy and sweets only on Saturday

Important Thoughts​

  • I want to raise my children in UK or US (good child care programs, that develops child's brain) or parents live with me
  • 1st 3 years of the child's brain development is most important
  • Never ever fight before the children
  • How to develop curiosity in a child (thirst and passion of knowledge)
    • Hard working
    • Balanced life
  • Have child early, so that phase is complete and then you can focus on ageing parents (so they both don't coincide)
  • Children do not cry if they fall down if no one is around, they will standup and find their parents, and seeing their parents, they will start crying
  • Have 3 serial marriages over the lifetime (Youthful passion, Parenthood, Companionship, and all 3 can be the same too) - there are 3 different demands

Questions Every Parent Should Ask​

  • Do I sometimes solve my child's problems before they even try?
  • Do I praise effort as much as I praise achievement?
  • Do I allow them to face discomfort, or do I rush to shield them?
  • Am I teaching them to listen as much as they speak?

Pre-Marital Genetic Counselling​

For rare diseases defect screening before having children.

Minimalism with Kids​

Tell kids that they can have all the toys they want until they can be stored in a cupboard. So they have to make choices, of what they want to buy or what they want to keep. Like they can have all the arts and crafts until they fit in a box.

Important Parenting Concepts​

I've studied over 200 kids—the happiest ones have parents who do 9 things with them every morning

  1. Self-regulate before you reconnect
  2. Lead with connection, not correction
  3. Create pockets of calm amid chaos
  4. Find moments for laughter
  5. Check in emotionally, not just logistically
  6. Make physical touch non-negotiable
  7. Create a screen-free sanctuary
  8. Honor the power of slowness
  9. Create a bridge before goodbye

Smart Kids Aren't Made With ABC & 123 (Use These 3 Principles Instead) - YouTube

5 Tiny Habits That Supercharge Your Child's Brain Development | Dr. Arif Khan - YouTube

  • Serve and Return
  • Read one book everyday
  • Consistent sleep routine
  • Let them struggle a little
  • Let them help

I've studied hundreds of highly successful kids: The No. 1 parenting style that worries me

  • Help kids notice genuine needs around them
  • Build contribution into daily routines
  • Make the invisible work of care visible